Everybody's got a dream.

Overheard in my van last week:

"You know what I'm going to be when I grow up?"

"What?"

"A guard at the Natural History Museum."

"OH. MY. GOD. Me too!"

"I know! We'll work there together!"

"Yeah, we'll have to wait until we're older, though."

"Like when we're forty-two."

Five days later:

"There HAS to be a way we can get to be security guards sooner."

"Yeah."

"We could wear disguises."

"That would never work."

"Oh."

"Unless they think we're midgets."

Thanks, Ricky Gervais. We couldn't afford Harvard anyway.